


Grumpy cats unite

by biffes



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: AU, Derek may or may not be a werewolf, Erica is alive, Isaac is still in Beacon Hills, M/M, Stiles doesn't know Derek, grumpy cat is male, minor Scisaac
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-17
Updated: 2014-07-17
Packaged: 2018-02-09 06:22:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1972236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biffes/pseuds/biffes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles is the owner of Grumpy cat. It's the perfect reason to approach the hot guy at Jungle who has the grumpiest expression on his face.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Grumpy cats unite

**Author's Note:**

> I have this thing about hot men and cats. Also, about Grumpy cat and Dylan O’Brien making a selfie. Also, about Sterek being a thing. So, voilá, this happened!  
> Grumpy cat happens to be male here.

„Dude!” A voice shouted somewhere behind Derek. He would have gone on ignoring it, only the owner of the voice appeared in front of him with flailing arms. It was this skinny guy in a red hoodie and alcohol-warmed pink cheeks. Derek raised an eyebrow to convey his annoyance. The kid seemed undeterred. „Dude, you totally look like my cat!” Is what came out of his mouth next which was probably the last thing Derek expected anyone ever to open a conversation with. Erica and Isaac, who were standing close by, burst out laughing.  
„What.” He said to the stranger and made it a question, doing his best to ignore his horrible treacherous friends.  
„Scott! Tell him he looks like Grumpy.” They were joined by another kid. Scott, the newcomer looked a bit out of his depth being put suddenly on the spotlight.  
„You kinda do, dude.” At Derek’s murderous look – which Scott must have thought was meant to be questioning – he elaborated. „Stiles has this cat named Grumpy cat, and you two totally look alike.”  
Erica seemed to be on the verge of keeling over laughing too much and Isaac had this expression on his face that said: I’m so into this Scott guy.  
„It’s called Grumpy? Tell us more, please, this is priceless,” Erica told Scott, wiping her eyes.  
„Uh, well, yeah. He’s Grumpy, because he has this moustache-like thing going on and those deep-set eyes and your friend, uh - ”  
„- Derek,” Isaac supplied eagerly.  
„… your friend Derek has this beard and the downward curve to his mouth and similar eyes.”  
„More importantly the Grumpy spirit.” Stiles added.  
„And how would you know that?” Derek asked him.  
„I was watching you all night,” Stiles told him, like it was completely acceptable to ogle someone all night in a bar. Erica smirked at Derek knowingly. „You didn’t crack a smile ever since you came in, you glared at every person who bumped into you – which is everyone by the way, this is a club you know, it’s perfectly normal – and you have this air of being the king of the Jungle, which is funny because that’s what this place is called -”  
„Shut up, Stiles.”  
„Exactly my point,” Stiles showing his index finger in Derek’s face like he just proved an important point. Which he didn’t. „Grumpy is very proud and also very judgemental and mostly annoyed with the whole world until he gets some food in his tummy.”  
Derek’s stomach decided it was the right moment to speak up, making Erica crack up laughing.  
„But he’s a fuzzy little princess when you get to know him and he never stops purring when he’s in bed with me.”  
„What is it that you are saying?” Derek asked him before he could draw any more embarrassing parallels.  
„That he wants you to purr in his bed, of course,” said a redhead who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. Stiles’ whole face went beetroot red.  
„Lydia! What are you doing?” Stiles hissed.  
„Making sure the two of you stop ogling each other from the opposite sides of the bar all night and get to the hot feline sex or whatever you are into. This was the longest eye-fucking a gay club has ever seen.”  
„Girl, I couldn’t have said it any better,” Erica told Lydia, sounding impressed. „Derek was extra insufferable tonight and I didn’t know why until now: he was stalking the prey.”  
„Please, I don’t need to stalk anyone. They come to me.” Derek ground out. To his surprise Stiles continued to nod and grin.  
„You are so Grumpy!” he told Derek, like it was the highest form of compliment. „Ever since I put on the first video of him on Youtube, people basically lie at his feet and worship him. From gifts to letters…”  
„Except he’s tiny,” Derek said before he could stop himself. He did intend to reveal he knew which internet famous cat they were talking about.  
„What?” Stiles asked, while Erica just snorted „Too much information, Derek”.  
Once again Stiles’ whole face went an interesting shade of red. Derek decided he liked it on the otherwise pale skin.  
„Oh, get a room or a cat bed or just fuck in the back alley like every horny teenager and cat in heat does.” Erica told them in no uncertain terms.  
„Just stop with the cat in heat jokes.” Derek replied.  
„I will. If you just say out loud that you are not at all interested in Bambi-eyes.” She said it as a challange and Derek opened his mouth to say the words, but found himself closing his mouth again, unable to voice them. Stiles beamed at him.  
„Off you go then.” Erica waved at Derek and Stiles, vaguely pointing at the exit. „You boys are clearly too domestic cats for the Jungle.”  
Derek eyed Stiles from sideways. In the end he left without a word to the others, Stiles following in his heels.

\---

„So, have you really been watching me all night back in the club?” Stiles asked Derek. He took a moment to answer, mostly because Stiles’ fingers drawing circles on his chest, getting entangled in his chest hair was very distracting to say at least.  
„You seemed suspicious. You kept looking over at me.”  
„I tried to be subtle.”  
„You missed subtle by light years.”  
„Har har. Breaking news, ladies and gentlemen: Grumpy man tells jokes.” Stiles poked a finger in Derek’s sternum, but he was smiling.  
„I’d much rather go another round,” Derek replied. He rolled them over so he was leaning over Stiles.  
„Really? Do cats have shorter refractory periods than humans?”  
Derek shut him up with a kiss. It was the kind of dirty, powerful, lots of tongue kiss that would silence Stiles for a while. He pushed Stiles’ hands over his head into the pillow and peppered his chest and neck with kisses. By the time Derek reached his nipple, he was moaning, trashing, and making all around the most delicious noises. Derek bit his shoulder and the juncture of neck and shoulder, and nosed the soft skin behind his ear. By the time Derek’s teeth closed on his ear, Stiles let out one needy word:  
„Please.”  
Derek had to forcefully unattach himself from the temptation of Stiles’… well, everything.   
He untangled his legs from the sheet and stumbled out of the bed looking for the pack of condoms.  
„I think I threw it on the floor,” Stiles told him, unashamedly checking out Derek’s naked body. Derek liked the feeling of those eyes on him. After a bit of crawling on the floor, he finally found the box. He was about to stand up, when he was startled by a pair of eyes in the dark and an unexpected:  
„Meow.”  
„Jesus fuck!” Derek promptly dropped the box and backed away from the eyes, clutching his chest.  
Stiles very unfairly – Derek thought – laughed.  
„Derek, meet Mr. Grumpy cat. Grumpy, meet Derek aka Grumpy man.”  
„He was watching us,” Derek accused Stiles, keeping one eye on the cat lest it planned on attaching him.  
„I think he is just mispleased that we woke him up with that energetic fucking.”  
„Shut him out.”  
„No way! He’d just be pissed at me for a week. And, yeah, that’s not happening. Grumpy has the worst sulks.”  
„I hate cats.” Stiles actually sat up in the bed in outrage.  
„What? You can’t! That’s like a deal breaker for me.”  
Derek sighed, but reluctantly added:  
„Fine. It’s the other way around: cats hate me.”  
„Bullshit. Grumpy will love you. You two are clearly soulmates.” Stiles said. He pat the comforter next to him. „C’me here.” Derek did.  
Once Stiles restarted the kissing, Derek completely forgot about any other living creature that might have been lurking around in the dark.

\---

„He’s glaring at me.”  
Stiles groggily opened his eyes, blinking at the sudden light.   
„Who is?”  
„The cat.” Stiles looked around Derek at Grumpy, who was lounging on the windowsill, barely glancing at Derek.  
„He’s not glaring at you. That’s just how his face is.”  
„Looks like he’s about to attack me any second.”  
„Well, to be fair, you did hog his side of the bed all night. That’s like not cool, dude, not even in the animal kingdom.”  
„I’m not awake enough for this,” Derek said, rubbing his eyes.  
„Feel free to make yourself some coffee and bacon in the kitchen,” Stiles told him cheerfully.

\---

When Stiles finally managed get up, answering the call of the wonderful smell of bacon, he was greeted by the best view possible: Derek shirtless, only wearing those low-slung jeans, sitting in a high chair getting rubbed on and purred all over by Grumpy, who had very obviously had a taste of bacon and wanted more, and was thus targeting the source of food (the traitor). Luckily nor Derek nor Grumpy noticed Stiles, so he hastily pulled his phone out of his backpocket and filmed the whole scene of Derek picking him up and stroking the cat behind the ears and on the back, talking to Grumpy in a low, soothing voice and generally being nice and friendly.  
Stiles did put the video up on Youtube. It did get over a million views. Of course Derek was grumpy about it. Life was perfect.


End file.
